This current phrase has a different aura to someone of my age. Of course I am following the dictates of contemporary usage by wearing a face mask the few times I venture out of my home, while also trying to maintain a six foot space between myself and others as much as possible. But there is a subtle change going on here that is more than a reaction to a virus.
One of my earliest memories is of being taught how to greet people. Upon being introduced one was to look the other person in the eye, and then put out one’s hand for a handshake. It was important that the handshake be firm but not too firm. The ultimate horror, I was told, was to shake with a hand that resembled a limp fish. I can remember bravely sticking out my hand to an unknown adult, conscious of trying to be part of the grownup world. Now we are told that this time honored way of greeting each other needs to be done away with, and we need to find another more germ free method of greeting our fellow humans. I have to admit that to me bumping elbows just looks awkward, and while a Namaste from someone in a sari looks gracious, I feel a little ridiculous doing it in a pair of jeans. I think perhaps I will settle for a friendly nod of the head. But more than a custom will be gone when the handshake becomes a thing of the past, but also a way of connecting with others.
I was also taught the power of a smile. If someone, particularly an adult, smiled at me I was to return that smile or I would look self-centered and spoiled. But now I am in a mask and not only is my breath not cascading onto others, I cannot connect to them with a smile. I had an awkward moment the other day while trying to pass someone on the sidewalk as we both tried to keep a suitable social distance. I smiled to show my humor at this clumsy moment, but realized quickly that my smile was hidden by a mask. I do not know the other person’s reaction either as his mouth was also covered. We were truly distanced by more than six feet.
I think of all the auditoriums I have sat in for the last seven decades watching one youth performance after another. Part of the pleasure in watching one’s own progeny perform is to interact with other parents and share their pride in their offspring. If we are seated many seats away from each other this pleasure will be gone, and it will be only about our own family and not the community as a whole.
If social distancing is to become the norm, I think all of us will have to be careful we do not distance ourselves from society as a whole. As the rules change, let us hope we can all find a way to connect with each other in this unknown new world into which we are entering.